Those were not my roaches in the ash tray!

Those were not my roaches in the ash tray!

Judge Thorne, defendant partner up to solve marijuana mystery

news@theeveningtimes.com

During questioning of the felony offenders Judge Fred Thorne of West Memphis District Court asked one person, “Where do you go to school?”

“In Memphis, I don’t know the name of it.”

“You don’t know the name of the school you attend?”

“High Tech or something.” “How many of you people in here have gone to a school you don’t know the name of?”

The next felony charge was asked, “Where do you work.”

“I worked last week at an under-the-table job.”

The third person was asked, “How much do you make a week?”

“I’m not sure. It depends on how many hours I work.”

“How much do you make if you get 40 hours?”

“Ha-ha,” was all the defendant could say.

“When I worked, I knew exactly what I made. I had to figure out what bills I could pay that week!”

replied the judge.

A man in jail was charged with domestic battery. He pled guilty.

“Why did you hit on her, sir?”

“I didn’t hit her.”

“Who is she?”

“My girlfriend.”

“The report says you pushed her down and she got a knot on her head.”

“Yeah. That’s all I did was push her.”

“Are you and her going to get back together?”

“Probably.”

“You also accuse her of cheating. I don’t know why

Judge Fred Thorne she would stay with you.

$500 plus court costs and one year suspended to six months probation. I don’t want you and her to have any more trouble. Be back here December 5th for your first review.”

A woman in jail was charged with domestic battery also. She also pled guilty.

“Someone says you hit him with a table leg.”

“I hit him with the remote control.”

“The report says his eye was bleeding. Why did you hit him?”

“Because he hit me twice in the jaw.”

“How long have you been together?”

“Six years.”

“You did this before, I see.

$500 plus court costs and 30 days.”

A man charged with criminal trespass pled no contest. “Why did you go back to Southland when you had been banned?”

“I didn’t know I was banned.”

“$150 plus court costs.”

“How do you plead to possession of marijuana?”

asked Judge Thorne of a man in jail.

“No contest.”

“What do you have to tell me?”

“They was talking about roaches in the ash tray.

They wasn’t mine. I didn’t know the stuff was in there.”

“You were in the front seat, so they can be assumed to have been yours.” “Why were you in Arkansas?”

“I went to a birthday party.”

“Why was your license suspended?”

“I got a ticket in 2008 and never paid the fine.”

“$500 plus court costs.”

A woman in jail was charged with loitering. Her plead was guilty.

“Why were you trying to hide clothes behind a trailer?”

“I just came from Louisiana helping those people down there and I was just trying to get back home.”

“Where do you live?”

“Memphis.”

“How did you end up in West Memphis on your way home from Louisiana?”

“I was just trying to get home.”

“Jail, let her out tomorrow at noon.”

A man in jail had a charge of driving on suspended.

He pled no contest.

“How long have you been a correctional officer?”

“17 years.”

“At Brickeys?”

“I recently transferred to the new ACC facility in West Memphis.”

“Why was your license suspended?”

“I got a speeding ticket.”

“If you have worked for the system, you should know that if you don’t pay your speeding ticket and your reinstatement fee you will get your license suspended.”

“I haven’t been in trouble for 26 years.”

“$295 plus court costs and two days house arrest.”

“Come on up, my favorite person. Did you get arrested just to give me some love?”

A man in the jail came forward.

“How do you plead to criminal trespass?”

“No contest.”

“How come you wouldn’t leave the 8th Street Mission?”

“I didn’t know I was barred from there.”

“Do you have some relatives somewhere far off like Wyoming or Washington?”

“Yes, I have relatives in Seattle.”

“That would be a great place for you to go.”

“How much to get a float to get out of West Memphis?”

“Get with my bailiff.

Whatever it takes we’ll help you. Jail, let him out at noon tomorrow also. See, I know him and didn’t even have to call his name.”

A woman in the courtroom was charged with no child restraint and running a stop sign. She pled no contest.

“I didn’t run the stop sign.

I stopped, turned the radio down and yelled at my sister to put her seat belt on.”

“$75 plus court costs on the child restraint. I’ll dismiss the stop sign.”

A young man in the courtroom was charged with no driver’s license and no proof of insurance.

“How old are you?”

“17.”

“Who do you have with you?”

“My mother.”

“Mother, did you give him a car with him having no driver’s license?”

“No. He bought it himself.”

“Where do you live?”

“Memphis.”

“Are you on the football team?”

“Yes.”

“Maybe not. Why can’t you get a driver’s license?”

“I didn’t pass the test.”

“What does your coach think if you can’t pass the test. How does he think you can remember plays? Mom you choose. $55 plus court costs on the driver’s license or eight hours community service? $295 plus court costs on the insurance or 16 hours community service?

We can work this out for the weekends.”

“He can do the service.”

“Your first review will be December 12th. If you don’t get it done you can have barbecued hash and candied yams in the jail for Christmas. If you get it all done and bring proof, I’ll keep it off your record, this time.”

By the Evening Times News Staff